Weather Report (1989)

Welcome to Marseilles
It’s raining today
This sunny Mediterranean seaport
Whose spry citizens are descended
From the strongest stock of Greek and Roman sailors
Is wet with the tears of God
And every face is bleak
As though their beloved sun
May never return

Addicts, all of them
They’d fare poorly in overcast Paris
Or foggy Brest
Or dismal Cherbourg with its musical umbrellas

Helios, whose light they crave and worship
Smiles upon them nearly daily
And when he wearily decides
For just one morning to abandon his chariot duty
And sleep in, allowing Zeus a tantrum with his
Mighty lightning and furious thunder
It is as though someone has snapped away
Their very life force
Holding them down
And stealing their breath

This town shrieks and laments in the rain
It cries and mourns and grieves under cover of cloud
And the heralded cold Mistral wind
Will sweep today out of the sky
And should bring us a bright, clear tomorrow

Massilia of old
Was rarely wet, I’m told
But now I’ve come to see
The rain may get to me

Revelations (2008)

With a simple sentence the tables turn
And I realize the arrogant deception
Of my long-considered advantage

Bound to you by invisible shackles
My chains heavy and chafing
To deny that you are in control now
Seems suddenly ludicrous

“Trust and let go,” I breathe inside
The cruel innocence of your question
Finds me precariously balanced
Between steely will
And the gauze of vulnerability

I clumsily stumble
And feel my restraints pull tighter
Yanking my equilibrium
And the acrobatic dance of my response begins
A spew of nonsense and tears
And I tumble

Chained to you
I am saved

Pro Nobis Peccatoribus (2008)

Ten thousand pin-pricks pierce my skin
Push past my protection
As her casual farewell bleeds me to life

Slowly I rise
Too quickly
Time is terse and fleet
Parting passes
I stand solitary
Savoring the agony of when and how
So preferable to if

Will not, wish not
Waste not, want not
We knot ourselves up
In proverbs and parables
As we rush in
Where angels fear to dread
Treacherously transgressing
All we swore to hold sacred
Bathed in our own destiny
Replaying dirty history
Ever less innocent for naïvely
Not knowing how it ends

Still unrepentant
For the error of my youth
I battle now a fire long grown cold
Burning out of control but still
Too weak to take hold
And destroy with bold decision
A coldness now grown fiery

Brazen and audacious
I drop to my knees
And mutter prayers of paradox
Impiously impenitent
And petition
The merciful God of fools and sinners:

May untenable last
Unlikely remain
Insane make sense
Impossible affirm
Never again return
And forever fail

Amen

The Bawdy Schwa (1994)

As many others before her
The aged woman felt
Suddenly
Too tired to try
To be the woman
She was just a moment ago

She struggles with her self
Expresses her disgust
Through attempted joy
Feeling the tremble of
Irony
In her shriveling, knotted body

The bawdy schwa
Issues forth
Breathy from her soul
Down deeper
Than the thrill
Of her lover's heart

They lie
Naked
In truth
He is rejuvenated by her pain
She is betrayed by his ecstasy

At The Church Wall (1987)

And the old man stood there leaning against the church wall

He was thinking about her warm face
And how she had blue eyes
What eyes she had
So blue, so beautiful, and so blue

She danced like the wind
Warm blue wind like summertime
Dancing

And her eyes danced
As her hair blew in the wind
Her eyes blue
In the wind

And he stood against the church wall thinking
About her blue eyes dancing

She would dance for hours
Like the wind dancing on the lea
Dancing with her brown hair trailing
In the warm blue wind

And he thought about her
Standing by the church wall
Falling to the ground
Blue eyes dancing
Summer breezes blowing
Quiet whispers “I love you”
Whisper
Choir voices filled the chapel
Silence fell upon him
Heavy silence watching
Quiet whispers “I am going”
Blue eyes closing
Lying by the church wall quiet
Still blue eyes

And her eyes were blue
And danced

And he fell against the church wall
Angry
Listening to the warm wind
Dancing
Like her blue eyes always did

Land (2009)

Alone, adrift
Batted by the currents
I bob and float against my will

This ocean is tempestuous
And fraught with hidden peril
Your placid beach just out of reach
On the horizon unattainable

As I desperately cling to my longing desire
To once again be pulled to the safety of your strand
I battle, tired of fighting
All but prepared to drown
Lured to the peace
Offered by the abyss of forfeit

But mine has been a lifelong odyssey
And I have sought your coast from so far away
Thrown by turns far off course
And now within measurable distance
Of your alluring shore

I long again to feel your sand beneath my feet
To walk assured of the stable rule of land
To know that I can guide my own path
Instead of allowing
The forces of time and tide
To wash me whither they will

I envisage walking with my head high
Breathing the salty air of the love in which I struggle
Without fear of losing my life
In the grip of its surging power
My feet planted in your terra firma
With the frothy breakers lapping gently at my toes

I remember those long ago walks along your beach
In watercolor postcard recollections
Of a time in which I mastered the pull of the sea
And frolicked on your shore
And bathed freely in your love

I am exhausted
So weary of fighting for precious air
Dispirited by the tantalizing vision of your seaboard
I beg in vain for rescue
Knowing that your warm sands
Cannot extend your reach to pull me to your solace
Or even beckon me closer

Fueled by fantasy alone
Strengthened in nothing but reverie
I stubbornly pray God for the fortitude to survive
Not to abandon my hope after such a long struggle
To find the courage in my thoughts of time past
To feed the dreams of a future in which
I can again stand

Swells are taking over
And I am nearly spent
Alone, adrift
I now must inhale one last time
And furiously swim
To land